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Date with self

“I don’t even know what I really want – all I know is that life could be more – I could be more, There’s nothing wrong with my life – in fact, anyone looking at it from outside would probably envy me –  and yet, I feel there’s something lacking,” I knew I was rambling and I carried on. It felt nice to be able to voice the conflicts and confusion in my head.

And so I went on – “you know, I’m fairly successful – but still that doesn’t give me the kick that I thought it would. I think it’s the mid-life crisis or some similar stuff!” And now I looked at my coach – sitting by my side – just listening to me. And that got me – what was it about her that I was able to ramble on about things I never even thought about in my routine life. It was as if she was totally on my side. I didn’t need to give explanations or feel guilty about feeling empty in spite of the life I had.

And then, in a tone of total acceptance she asked a few questions – which made me think – like, really think. And her questions had nothing to do with my work or family. These were questions about what really mattered to me – my values and beliefs. She asked me if my success aligned with who I really thought I was. She asked me to define my identity – who I thought I was, who I was being in different situations and who I’d like to become. I thought about all my roles and all my behaviors. I thought about congruency of behaviors and values. In fact, I thought as I’d never thought before – and it was as if doors within me opened one by one – each revealing a facet of myself I’d never seen. And I looked at my life from various angles, through the eyes of different people – and each view changed my perception of my world.

When I left, I was in deep though – a lot more aware of myself and what I really stood for. There were beliefs I’d held in life I wasn’t even aware of – some were building me up and yet some were strong stumbling blocks. I still didn’t know how to get over those – I could see where I wanted to reach – the route had to yet get defined. There’s so much that I’ve allowed in life – I’ve allowed life to happen to me rather than my crafting out my life. Sure, I’ve taken charge now and then – but in this journey, I often lost sight of what really and truly mattered.

 With this new clarity, came new hopes and a new enthusiasm to write my own story now. The first date with self had been exciting – now the work towards making it a lifelong blissful relationship had to begin – and I looked forward to meeting myself again!

About the author

Payal & Priyanka

Payal & Priyanka

Payal and Priyanka are a pair of Army Wives who are dedicated to the cause of life! These NLP life coaches with their brand called Wings Team. Read their blogs posts on Wednesday Wisdom, right here on to know more about life and life coaching! Highly qualified, highly professional and always ready to spread some cheer with their unique methods – that is the best way to define the two founders of Wings Team!

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